Achieve Any Goal With This Simple Formula
Having trouble reaching a goal? This scientific method will get you there with a simple, easy to follow formula.
John Yandt lost his father when he was young. In his small town high school he would put photos of his father in his locker so he could see him each morning. But kids saw the photos and decided to make fun of the shy young teenager. He was bullied and made fun of every day at school. He ate alone in the cafeteria and felt completely isolated.
His family decided to move to London, Ontario to give Josh a fresh start in a new school. But Clarke Secondary School was much bigger, a city school, and Josh would have to start over. Josh made a courageous decision. He decided that he would no longer be bullied and no longer be invisible. He decided to make this change by starting with one small habit, one act of kindness, the act of opening the door for other students as they arrived at school and saying something kind to them. Instead of fighting back with anger, Josh fought back with kindness.
Watch Josh’s story below:
Josh made an amazing change in his life, just by committing to do one small, kind habit each day. You can create your own small, kind habit that can make a big difference in your life, too.
Implementation Intention
Josh did something that scientists call Implementation Intention. The idea for Implementation Intention was introduced in 1999 by psychologist Peter Gollwitzer (Gollwitzer, P. M. (1999). Implementation intentions: Strong effects of simple plans. American Psychologist, 54, 493-503.) Implementation Intention means that, when you want to reach a goal, you are more likely to be successful when you are very specific in what you are going to do to achieve it. For example, in Josh’s case, his goal was to ‘become visible and liked’ at school. Each day, when he arrived at school, his plan was to open doors for others and say kind things. His plan included two of the most important parts of Implementation Intention. Time and location. His location was school. His time was every day when he arrived.
Gollwitzer’s studies demonstrated that people are more successful in reaching a goal when they determine a specific location that then cues them to perform a specific act. In Josh’s case, the location was his school and the specific act was opening doors and saying something kind.
How can Implementation Intention benefit you, and how does kindness play a role?
You can see in Josh’s case, he wanted to be accepted and liked. That hadn’t happened for him at his first school. He had a goal, but he didn’t know how to make it happen. But when he created a specific plan and action and committed to doing kind behaviors, he was successful. As you see in the video, he was even more successful than he had dreamed. His behaviors weren’t huge and earth shattering. They were small and repeatable and easy to do.
When you watch Josh’s incredible story, you can see that he wasn’t immediately successful. At first the other students thought his behavior was a little strange. But as his story progresses, you can see the brilliance of his plan. Not only did students start responding positively to him, they also started developing their own behaviors of kindness. They opened doors. They picked up books for others. Josh started a kindness snowball.
There have been hundreds of other studies validating that Implementation Intention works to help people reach and sustain goals. You probably practice implementation intention without realizing it, if you do things like scheduling an appointment for your dental check up and putting it on your calendar, or taking the trash out to the curb every Wednesday if that’s your known trash day, or filing your taxes electronically by April 15th. When you set a goal, then commit to a specific plan that includes location and time, you are much more likely to achieve your goal and stick with it.
How to Use Implementation Intention to Reach Your Goals
You can apply the same principles that Josh did. Maybe you want to have a better relationship with someone, a spouse/partner, a friend, a co-worker, a grandchild. Or maybe you want to feel happier at work. These are goals that you can achieve by using Implementation Intention and kindness.
As an example, if you want to improve your relationship with your spouse/partner, you might make a plan that goes like this: every morning at home at 7am I am going to give my spouse/partner a hug and tell them how much I appreciate them. Your plan is specific – your location is ‘at home’, your time is ‘7am’, and your behavior is ‘hug and tell them how much I appreciate them.’ You can modify the location and time to fit your circumstances.
Or perhaps you realize that, when you get home in the evening, you are both tired and a little disconnected. You can change the time to 6pm (or whatever works for your schedule) and completely change the harmony in your evenings.
At work, you could simply do what Josh did – open doors for others and say something kind to them. Or you could decide that, every day when you reach your desk at work you are going to go over to a co-worker and tell them that it’s nice to see them.
Got grandchildren? How about every Wednesday at 6pm you call them to ask how their day went? Or every Monday text them to say you love them.
These are just a few examples. The possibilities are nearly endless. Be creative and have fun with it!
Remember that Josh wasn’t immediately successful. At first the other students were confused by his behavior. That may happen to you, too! But consistent commitment to your specific plan will result in reaching your goal.
Reach Your Goal With This Simple Formula
If you want to reach a goal, you can do it. Not by setting a vague goal, like I want to be happier at work, but by being specific and using Implementation Intention. Decide on your goal, then determine the behavior you will do, when and where and be sure to include that it is an ongoing behavior.
It helps to write down your plan. It would look something like this:
“I will [BEHAVIOR] in [LOCATION] at [TIME] [ONGOING].”
You could also write it as:
[GOAL] = [BEHAVIOR] in [LOCATION] at [TIME] X ONGOING.
If you want to improve your relationships of any kind, or you’d like to enjoy work more and be more successful and happy, you can do it with kindness and Implementation Intention. What would it mean to you to have a better relationship with your spouse/partner, your children, your friends, your co-workers, your boss, your neighbors? Picture how your life would be. Happier? More successful? More fulfilled?
My goal = My Behavior at Location at Time, Ongoing. Repeat. You’ve got this!
May your life be filled with Kindness 💜
Heather Johnston Brebaugh
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