I'm happy to hear that you had more 😊 than 😔 while growing up. I believe that most children are kind. They also want to fit in, so there's always the temptation to follow someone who is more assertive.
I think that part of growing up includes finding yourself as well as finding your tribe.
Thanks so much for your thoughts on this, Mitchell.
Such an important topic, Heather, in this frightful age of intensified bullying. Here is my two-minute story about being bullied and the pain caused by words. My mother's ineffectual way of dealing with it is funny, now, but it wasn't then. I find I can STILL be seriously wounded by criticism. I hope you don't mind I share it.
Thank you, Mitchell. You bet I do! My short-term memory is very poor now, but my long term memory goes back to age four! (Why is that?) Heather's wonderful article triggered so many memories.
I love your story, Sharron.....and commented on your page! I love that you can laugh about some of the things from your childhood now.....isn't perspective wonderful!
Wish I were in Santa Cruz so I could come give you a big hug!
Heather's Kindness Magnet post today made me think of the book The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz which I read in 2022. The first agreement is to be impeccable with words. Meaning: use words which inspire. Link to audio version of the book on Audible:
When my husband had dementia, he became verbally abusive. They said “it’s the disease, don’t pay any attention” which was true, but the words still hurt coming from the person I had lived with and loved for over 60 years.
I'm so sorry you had to go through that, Janice. Dementia is not a 'kind' disease, for anyone. My father-in-law had dementia. He was the sweetest man, yet he became verbally abusive to his wife. My mother had dementia and she became nicer than ever. It's such an unpredictable disease.
I’m kind of late to this rodeo, but at least I’m reading your posts.
You reminded me of a post I wrote early on which all zero of my nonsubscribers never read. Words can heal. I still remember a Bible text about it I learned as a kid: “Words fitly spoken are like apples of gold in pictures of silver.” Proverbs 25:11–13
Back from reading. I loved your Keith Richards memes....but more important I loved your message about 'words of wonder'. They may be 'words of wonder', but in truth, they are so easy (and important) to say. All humans want to be valued. I say sincerely to you, 'Thank you for your service.' You have made a difference and you continue to make a difference by sharing your stories.
A sneaky way to get more hits on your posts? I do it too.
Thanks for that, Heather. You are dead on about accepting compliments. I complained once to a friend about how another friend said all kinds of nice things about me publicly that were way overstated. So she asked me, “ Who is lying, you or M.”
Uhh.
And I think at this point I’m supposed to say thank you, so thank you. I really appreciate your kind words. Sometimes, while we stand in the middle of a river, we allow ourselves to die of thirst, so for today at least, I’ll take a pull from the waters of kindness.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a squirrel to chase.
I'm happy to hear that you had more 😊 than 😔 while growing up. I believe that most children are kind. They also want to fit in, so there's always the temptation to follow someone who is more assertive.
I think that part of growing up includes finding yourself as well as finding your tribe.
Thanks so much for your thoughts on this, Mitchell.
Love the quote from Solomon, thank you, Heather.
Such an important topic, Heather, in this frightful age of intensified bullying. Here is my two-minute story about being bullied and the pain caused by words. My mother's ineffectual way of dealing with it is funny, now, but it wasn't then. I find I can STILL be seriously wounded by criticism. I hope you don't mind I share it.
https://sharronbassano.substack.com/p/die-wir-mogen-necken-wir?
Thank you, Mitchell. You bet I do! My short-term memory is very poor now, but my long term memory goes back to age four! (Why is that?) Heather's wonderful article triggered so many memories.
Hoping some of them are wonderful!
Yes! They are. Thank you!
I love your story, Sharron.....and commented on your page! I love that you can laugh about some of the things from your childhood now.....isn't perspective wonderful!
Wish I were in Santa Cruz so I could come give you a big hug!
Happy hour. My house. Any day after 9 am. You are very welcome!
Heather's Kindness Magnet post today made me think of the book The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz which I read in 2022. The first agreement is to be impeccable with words. Meaning: use words which inspire. Link to audio version of the book on Audible:
https://www.audible.com/pd/The-Four-Agreements-Audiobook/B002VA3GJO?qid=1686590058&sr=1-1&ref=a_search_c3_lProduct_1_1&pf_rd_p=83218cca-c308-412f-bfcf-90198b687a2f&pf_rd_r=N4CJZAY8GTGM8ZPNP8Z8&pageLoadId=bmEAUXaB8AeTpZs4&creativeId=0d6f6720-f41c-457e-a42b-8c8dceb62f2c
Oh, I love that, Blake. "Use words which inspire."
Thank you so much for sharing the Audible link. My son is visiting this week, so this will be a welcome 'read' next week!
I have a used Audible credit waiting for such a book as this! Thanks.
When my husband had dementia, he became verbally abusive. They said “it’s the disease, don’t pay any attention” which was true, but the words still hurt coming from the person I had lived with and loved for over 60 years.
I'm so sorry you had to go through that, Janice. Dementia is not a 'kind' disease, for anyone. My father-in-law had dementia. He was the sweetest man, yet he became verbally abusive to his wife. My mother had dementia and she became nicer than ever. It's such an unpredictable disease.
There is solace in memories of the good times.
So very true. That was Dan, such a nice caring man who became nasty and abusive.
I’m kind of late to this rodeo, but at least I’m reading your posts.
You reminded me of a post I wrote early on which all zero of my nonsubscribers never read. Words can heal. I still remember a Bible text about it I learned as a kid: “Words fitly spoken are like apples of gold in pictures of silver.” Proverbs 25:11–13
Here’s my post: https://switters.substack.com/p/words-of-wonder
Excellent words from proverbs. I'm off to read your post. 🙂
Back from reading. I loved your Keith Richards memes....but more important I loved your message about 'words of wonder'. They may be 'words of wonder', but in truth, they are so easy (and important) to say. All humans want to be valued. I say sincerely to you, 'Thank you for your service.' You have made a difference and you continue to make a difference by sharing your stories.
I wrote about the gift of compliments in another post, which you may enjoy: https://heatherbrebaugh.substack.com/p/i-dont-know-what-to-say-the-gift
A sneaky way to get more hits on your posts? I do it too.
Thanks for that, Heather. You are dead on about accepting compliments. I complained once to a friend about how another friend said all kinds of nice things about me publicly that were way overstated. So she asked me, “ Who is lying, you or M.”
Uhh.
And I think at this point I’m supposed to say thank you, so thank you. I really appreciate your kind words. Sometimes, while we stand in the middle of a river, we allow ourselves to die of thirst, so for today at least, I’ll take a pull from the waters of kindness.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a squirrel to chase.